Being in the hospital this past week has really forced me to acknowledge the fact that these babies have to come out and not by a wave of a magic wand. This is the part that i have been dreading the most. This entire pregnancy I tried not focusing on the delivery and just on the joy of having my babies in my arms and being a mom. Well now all I think about are these contractions and the big delivery. Honestly it's all very daunting to me. I haven't committed to a c-section or a vaginal delivery. I get mixed opinions on both and it's a lot to consider. With a cesarean I worry about the recovery, the pain of nursing two babies and an incision, not to mention a scar. With vaginally I worry about putting my babies in distress or going through all of the labor and then needing an emergency cesarean anyway. I also worry that if the babies are in position for me to deliver "naturally" and I choose cesarean then I will regret not trying. My doctor is great, he said that if the babies heart rates look good and the babies are in position then he has no problem trying vaginally. It's pretty much up to me, the babies and how everything looks when it's time. At this point I have decided to leave it up to the Lord because we all know I can't do anything about their positions. The babies are both head down and facing out toward my belly button but with all this preterm contraction business anything can happen.
Another main worry I have is the Epidural, with twins I have to deliver in an operating room and the epidural isn't optional, it's mandatory. Now don't get me wrong, I do want one, that isn't the issue... It's the pain of getting one. I have heard so many horror stories about the pain of the needle that it freaks me out. I have a very low tolerance for pain and I find myself stressing over the thought of a gigantic needle being inserted into my back... So much so that it keeps me up at night. Now I know there are lots of good stories of epidurals, I'm just worried. When I had the steroid shots in my bum it hurt sooooo bad! I feel like I can still feel where they stuck the needles on both sides.
When I was growing up I used to believe that by the time I had kids the epidural would be more of an oral pill... Wishful thinking I know. People have babies all the time, the high majority of the time everything comes out just fine... Still... I'm scared.
6 comments:
I am so glad you got to come home! The epidural honestly does not hurt at all. I freaked myself out and then felt so stupid after it was over that everyone in the room was laughing bc I could not stop laughing at myself! I too had to deliver in the OR and it was not a big deal. They had everything there and ready and I was very comfortable and then there was a whole team of Doctors in the next room waiting for Eli.. It was really comforting! Just know that woman have gone through this same thing from YEARS and are still having babies! I can understand being nervous with your first pregnancy and everything is new but once it is all over the process will not even phase you. Especially with the epidural, there is no pain and its a great experience and then the babies are HERE! I can not wait for you to be a new Mommy- focus on that and let all the worries go to the back of your head and just think about the joy of becoming a Mother and having these sweet miracles with you!
Thanks Kari. I can't believe I am so close to having these babies. I'll be happy when all is over and they are here. The unknown is super scary and I know that it will all be over soon .
honestly I hardly remember the shot, they actually give you a numbing shot and that kind of stings, then the epidural and I don't even remember feeling that. It's a little weird because while it doesn't hurt at all you can still feel pressure, but all you are going to care about is hearing those little babies cry. You'll do fine, the scar is hardly noticable and they put it low enought that if you were to wear a bikini you wouldn't even have a clue it was there.
I haven't checked your blog for a little while--so much happening! You're a strong person and I know you can do this!! And I don't even remember feeling the epidural--honestly. You will be okay! I'll be praying for you!!
I freaked out about the epidural too and it's not bad at all. You feel a little when they put the numbing shots in, but just feel pressure when the epidural shot is in. I thought the IV was worse. You will be amazed how strong you are! And those babies will be so worth it!
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